No more coffee with granny

Almost every Saturday and Sunday, my father, brother and I would have coffee and cookies with grandmother.

My grandmother would sit in her favorite chair and we would reminisce about the old days, while drinking coffee from our own custom made coffee and cookies mugs. She would tell about her younger years, when she worked as a nurse. She would talk about my dad and what he was like as a kid.

Grandmother had Alzheimer, dementia, survived a few strokes and had a pacemaker. But despite all of that, she still had her stubborn, no-nonsense attitude. She always said that sugarcoating was only good for cookies. That it’s best speak up, no talk but action.

Because of Alzheimer and dementia, she started repeating her short stories every 5 minutes. But she would never forget to drink her coffee or eat her cookies.

As the years went by, the Alzheimer and dementia got worse. Her mobility became worse. Eventually she had to move to the very nursing home where she used to work when she was herself a young woman.

Of course we continued to have coffee and cookies with her there. We would pick her up from the living room and drive her with her wheelchair to her own room. We had our special custom made coffee and cookies mugs and would sit with her, read the many postcards she had gotten from her family.

Granny started to speak less and less. Sometimes she would try to say something, but seemed to have trouble finding the words. But we still had our non-verbal connection and could still find ways to laugh with each other.

But then the Covid19 pandemic came. Lockdown everywhere, including here in the land of wooden shoes. And retirement homes did not allow any visitors. We hadn’t been able to see granny for 3 months.

It was hard not being able to see her. Especially considering her age and not knowing how she was doing. Of course I sent her an old fashioned postcard every week, but still..

Then finally, about a month ago we were finally allowed to visit her again. Covid19 proof, of course. Hands covered in rubber gloves, mouth and nose covered with facemasks, no touching, no hugging and no cookies or coffee.

We noticed grandmother’s condition had gotten worse. She seemed so so tired. Every now and then she would wake up and smile at us.

Last Saturday I had to work and was unable to visit granny. My father went with his second wife. Granny was unable to get out of bed. Dad was told that they had messed up with her medication. Prednison is no joke to mess with…

We were also informed that the chance for grandmother to live through another year would be slim. The doctors said it might be months or even weeks.

This week they gave her morfine. We all knew this meant nothing good. That’s why we hoped to visit grandma on Saturday.

But unfortunately this Thursday evening, July 23rd at 21.15 hours, grandmother has passed away. She died at the age of 97.

There will be no more coffee and cookies with grandmother. 😭


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