Superficial skittle poop

Hello lurking lurkers,

How are you today? It is Wednesday over here, 11.30 in the morning. Almost noon. I have a grilled sandwich in the grilled-sandwich machine and planted a plant for the first time in my life in our new garden. The weather is cold and chilly, which isn’t surprising since it is autumn already. I’ve overheard the whispering nags of passersby that for mid October the days have been absurdly cold here in the land of wooden shoes and windmills.
But. Don’t they state these observations every single new round of any season? Every summer, they claim it to be the hottest summer yet. Every winter is either the coldest or has too much or not enough snow. They will back-up these statements with pie-charts and the supposedly legit scientific studies that compare the seasons of this year with that of yesteryear. That’s when your favorite weather man or weather girl will tell you that today it is exactly skittles-crap percent colder than last year. And everyone is intrigued, impressed and believed these weather forecasts right away.

Well good for you, weather man. Good for you, weather girl. You’re full of shit anyways, because your predictions of the weather clearing up this week has, again, been a false prophecy of yours and your kind.

So… Enough about the weather… Moving on.

superficial

We people tend to judge things by what they look like. Don’t we? We go by what we see, smell and hear and make assumptions based upon what information our basic instincts picked up. It is quite shallow, but deep down we are all just shallow human beings, focusing on what’s seen on the surface instead of what might be inside. Assuming something is what it looks like until we examined it with a better look.

Anonymous Conversations

Back when there was no such thing as Facebook, Whatsapp or Instagram, we resorted to calling someone on the phone, emailing and chatting with our online friends via chat programs such as AOL and MSN and we even called one another.

Sharing your pictures with random strangers is something we rarely did. Well, it was something I rarely did anyways. Unless I had gotten to know the person on the other side a little better. I mostly chatted on MSN or emailed most of my online acquaintances for months and sometimes years, before revealing my appearance. Better yet, it was technically not even possible for a long time before you could actually use a profile picture on some of the chat programs we used back in those days.

It was nice to be sort of anonymous and be able to share your thoughts without actually having to show your face. An online chat felt like an online “confession booth” if you will. A way to just share whatever you want to get off your chest to that other random person with a funky screen name.

That’s when technology made it possible for MSN users to upload a profile picture. And social websites such as Myspace rose up along bumpy road of the world-wide-interwebs. Anonymity slowly vanished and more and more people started to show their true faces. Well.. Most of the people started showing their real faces. But, just like today, there’s always some catfish around pretending to be a mermaid.

I remember how I used to chat with this  guy for years and years without revealing our appearances to one another. We talked about our favorite bands such as Linkin Park and Papa Roach. We talked about how some music sucked. We talked about world issues. We talked about video games. We talked about life issues. We talked about all sorts of interesting stuff. It was just nice to be able to say whatever. Without having the conversation leading into a ridiculous cyber romance.

Don’t get me wrong. I know several people who’ve had a cyber romance and who are now happily married with children. But somehow when it is directed towards my persona, a cyber romance or any kind of romance for that matter just makes me cringe.

And then he finally saw my picture. His first response was something like this:

“OMG, is this you? OMG?! If only I knew you were this pretty before!”

His picture wasn’t bad to look at either. His appearance did not matter to me, frankly. I was glad to know the person who I’ve been talking with for so long has a face. But other then that, I didn’t feel the same excitement he experienced while looking at my actual picture…

His reaction just made me feel awkward. I just wasn’t into him like that and considered him like a good online friend. Unfortunately, our online conversations were not the same after that moment. Instead of talking about our favorite bands he would just act weird and just I wasn’t interested in him romantically. The conversations about interesting whatevers had become shallow and boring. And not much after that, I just decided to break contact with him all together

Profile Pictures

Things have changed a lot ever since the online  protocol on how to present oneself over the interwebs has changed even more with social media sites such as Facebook and the likes. I’m not going to write any other cliché comments about how good or bad these changes are. We’ve read those all before by other supposedly “social media experts”.  Social Media Expert my rear. What a load of skittle-crap that title is, by the way!

Anyways.

So just like a lot of others out there with a social media account, I too have slowly started posting my actual photo’s for a profile picture. About a decade and a half ago I would’ve thought it was silly. But now I do it, just like everyone else.

A serious question now: How many of you times do you chance the profile picture of your social media accounts? I chance it on a whim, so sometimes I will have the same profile picture for months and months and sometimes I will chance it every other week. 

It’s always nice when you choose a picture of your own face as a profile picture and receive tons of likes and positive comments by your social-media friends. I’m always curious to see what kind of picture will receive more likes. Not that I validate myself with the amount of likes and positive comments I get. On the contrary, I sometimes feel a tad creeped out to see what comments guys will leave me when I decide to choose a really nice picture.

Obviously, a picture of yourself with the right amount of lighting, the right amount of make-up and with a bright smile and warm vibe to it will receive more likes than a picture of your x-ray skull. Obviously, we will respond more positive when we see a picture of something that is appealing. But why? Just because something looks good does not automatically mean that it is good?

I still cannot get used to the fact of how people can react by simply seeing a good picture of you. Again and again I experience the awkwardness that is a friend who suddenly reveals to you they’d like to be more than just friends. Suddenly, they all want to take you out for dinner. Suddenly, they don’t talk to you as that random chick they know for ages. Suddenly, they act all weird. All because you decided to show your face online.

It almost makes one want to delete the profile picture. It almost makes one want to resort to posting random pictures of unicorns pooping into an ice-cream cone or maybe the face of a favored celebrity as a profile picture. But in the end, we are all superficial pieces of skittle poop. Myself included. Because as much as it makes my skin crawl that a picture of my face makes people want to raise their online thumbs and express their adoration towards my persona in all sorts of colorful ways, I do must say that I feel flattered.

And that is obviously pretty pathetic. It is so pathetic to put your face online for all to see and expect people to not say anything about it. It is stupid to think people will look at your pretty face and say “Wow, you must have a great personality.” How can they tell by just looking at your face? And are they saying it because they care about your personality, or do they just say it in the hopes that you will invite them over for a face-to-face get together…? Does it matter? Is it all that bad? I don’t know.

But you know what? Thankfully, there are still ways to still remain anonymous while expressing yourself on the interwebs. Just make yourself a new account to whatever social media site, come up with a random screenname and random profile picture.

So yay for my WordPress account! Allowing me ramble utter nonsense for years and years, with a hint of my personal mentionable moments and coated with an anonymous random avatar.

Wise parables from my mother;

everyday life situations described with food.

You’re invited for dinner. They decorate the table with creatively folded napkins. They decorate the plates. They might even decorate the glasses and light candles. There’s a nice bit of music on the background. Nice, huh?

You sit down at the table and the cook of the evening comes in with your food. The food looks beautiful and smells like heaven on a plate. Vegetables cut up in beautiful roses and a nice piece of meat. It looks so good.This must be the best food you will ever eat in your entire life.

But then you eat it. You expected the taste of heaven, but this dish is straight up torture for your bowels. The vegetables taste like a rotting pile of compost. The meat is so under-cooked that it could actually jump off your plate. What an unexpected disappointment!

You collect all your courage and finally dare to ask the cook if there’s anything else on the menu for you to eat. The cook looks insulted but nods politely and leaves with the plate.

Not much later, he eventually returns with a bowl of a thick old fashioned Dutch pea soup. The soup looks simple and even quite disgusting. But when you carefully spoon a bit of the soup to give the soup a try, it will taste like something heavenly made.

As my mother would say: 
Don’t judge a dish by the way it looks. 

That’ll be all. I think I’ve made my rant long and incoherent enough. I’m craving ice cream for some strange reason. I deserve a nice tasty bowl of ice cream right now! I will have myself a nice tasty bowl of ice cream. Yum-yum-yum.

Have yourself a wonderful day now. Thank you for lurking!

This_Unicorn_Changed_the_Way_I_Poop_SquattyPotty


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